So last week I joined the gym. Anyone who knows me will realize how monumental this is because I never even talk about exercising. You see, I never want to say I'm going to do something if I know that I'm not really going to do it (good policy right?) and thus far exercise has been something I haven't committed to doing. I did a bit last spring when I was preparing for Girl's Camp, but was so sore and wasted when I came home from camp that I gave myself a good 7 months to recover!
I have been hoping I'll have a great epiphany that will cause me to change my ways because I really don't want to do things that will just be a whim. After talking to Collette a couple weeks ago about her experiences with getting up to go to the gym at 4:50am each day (OUCH!) and her desire to be in good shape for our Paris trip so that she won't be weary and can do the things she wants to do I couldn't help but realize that I was setting myself up for failure. I don't want to go to Paris and be super self-conscious about my body and my frumpy fashions and be tired all the time. I want to soak it all up and have it be the best experience it can be.
So last week I went in to Contours Express (for Women) to check the place out. It looked good to me and they invited me to come in the next day for a free work out to see if I liked it. So last Wednesday morning I went and used muscles I didn't even know I had! I went back on Friday to sign up officially and am now committed for a year! I went in to exercise yesterday and will be going tomorrow too. I am feeling really good and think this plan is actually something I can and will do! (You're witnessing a modern day miracle just so you know!)
Also, yesterday before my workout I had to get weighed and measured (grim indeed) but was happy to find that I'm 17 pounds lighter than the last time I was weighed (last fall)! What in the world? It's so sad that there is nothing about my appearance to indicate this weightloss at all (I'm far too large for that to make a dent) but I'm excited anyway. The only way I can account for this at all is that I've changed my eating habits since then. I drink Carnation Instant Breakfast in the morning and then have been having a Smart Ones Meal for lunch, they're only 6 Weight Watcher points and are actually good. This has been life changing for me because lunch was always an issue for me and I often ended up eating chips and dip and other snack-type things because I didn't know what to have for lunch. Now I heat up one of these and can go about my day without the irritation and guilt of my fattening snack-lunches. Hooray!
I hadn't originally planned on posting about any of this because, but then thought I should come clean and share this info so that I'm not omitting details about my life. I just want to take control of my life without having it define who I am. I feel like this is a huge first step in becoming the best I can be and putting the self-loathing to rest. Plus, I'm going to be feeling good in Paris!
**Do want to make big changes secretly?
Have you had a body-image epiphany
or are you still waiting for yours?**
Have you had a body-image epiphany
or are you still waiting for yours?**
41 comments:
Yay, I'm first today! I understand keeping things like this a secret. I am like that too. I weighed less two weeks after I had Ryley than I do now. It's awful for my self esteem and I just need to get off of my butt!
Congratulations on your goals. I am sure you will achieve them!
Jill, just yesterday I was driving past Contours and wondered if you were going to post about your new gym membership or just keep it to yourself. (It was part of a longer thought processa bout the public nature of blogging, how nothing can be kept secret if it's on the Internet--these are the things swimming around in my head while driving). Without sounding patronizing, I'm proud of you for putting it out there. You are making a big life change--the commitment to take care of your body. It's not easy, it's often painful, but you will be so happy you did it. Once the need for a daily nap wears off. Way to go--and you know we'll all support you along the way.
i have so many things i want to change about me, but at times i think they are apart of me and can never change. but last month in the Ensign there was an article about Miracles that Christ performed while he was on earth. And i kept thinking if i really believe in miracles then why can't a miracle happen to me too.
so the things that i think will never change about me i am retraining my brain to think can change.
this article motivated me to do something small like stop biting my nails. it has been a month and no biting, that is a miracle.
so they answer to the question, yes i have many things i want to change and they are pretty much all a secret.
cograts on your goal... you are so strong, maybe this year you will be the girl i don't recognize at the blog party instead of Amie.
I completely understand the issue with not saying something until you're sure. I wrote an entry about going back to the gym & starting weights again...lasted a few days. Quite discouraging. But, please do continue to post on the subject. I need all the inspiration I can get!!
GOOD for you. I feel so good after i work out. Keep it up!!!! You will love it!
Good for you! I agree that lunch time is the hardest time of the day because it is just too easy to snack right through it. I hope that despite the hard days, you will love the energy that you will get from exercising.
YAY Jill- you can do it! So good to hear that your big life change is somethind you are choosing to do instead of happening to you. (Like job change out of your control, moving, etc)
I am overdue on starting the fitness plan and keep finding excuses (too much on my plate, not enough time, money) and so on. I am very proud of you for making the big leap.
Making changes in your behavior is never easy and I am so excited to hear that you are taking the steps to change. I know how you feel about not wanting to talk about changes you want to make in yourself.
I did something last week that was very uncharacteristic of me and could lead to a major positive change in my life. I don't want to jinx anything so for now, I am not talking about it, but I hope that soon I will be able to.
Congratulations on taking that very hard, first step!
Jill,
I am so proud of you! You are incredible and I feel like you are setting such a great example in more ways than you know to the people who read your blog and are inspired by you.
I've e-mailed and shared some of my story with you, but my husband and I just started the Body-for-Life contest again and needed some major motivation. We decided there was no better motivation than putting our "before" picture on the internet for our friends and families to see... We are also posting some specifics about daily workouts, recipes & eating, struggles & successes, etc. so if you'd like to check it out, go to: our84days.blogspot.com
Remember that I started at 215 pounds and it's still a constant battle for me so I can empathize with you for sure. And, I feel scared putting it on here knowing so many people read your blog, but if I can help anyone that would be worth the humiliation! Good luck with your membership and I am so proud of you. I know personally the mind-body struggles that we as women tend to deal with. Keep me posted!
Love, Karli
karli_jo77@hotmail.com
I don't know what I'm more impressed with, the fact that you joined the gym or the fact that you're blogging about it! I am so glad you put it out there -- whether you meet with quick success or have setbacks, I think it's wonderful to have all the people who care about you to support you along the way. I think your motives are great and I know you can do this!
I have major body image issues but I feel good that I am finally taking action. Yay us!
Good for you! I absolutely love to excersise (although actually finding time to do it is always hard), and I have noticed that when I find my grove and do it on a regular basis I feel so good. I never notice body changes because I excersise, but I know that it is good for me and makes me happy (there really is something about endorphines released etc. to make you feel good...it works for me!) I HATE the gym mainly because I don't like people watching me. I joined a "women's gym" in orem when I was going to BYU and it was the BEST experience! There weren't any wierd sweaty men and it made all the difference for me. I could actually enjoy the classes and could run on the treadmil without being self concious. I am sure you are going to love it and it is going to be a great experience for you!
Thanks for sharing your goals. Good luck with it all. It will be nice to keep up with all the walking in Paris and enjoy yourself.
My husband and I both came to terms with our health when we moved here a year ago. The five years in Provo had taken it's toll on both of us. We worked hard on lowering our calories dramatically. We both dropped over 30 pounds last year and we marvel on how much we used to eat.
I have started to feel myself plateau. And I have noticed that since the Holiday's I have been eating too much again. I want to someday get to the point where it isn't a constant struggle.
Do want to make big changes secretly? When I first started Jenny Craig, I didn't tell anyone because I was afraid I wouldn't stick with it...
Have you had a body-image epiphany
or are you still waiting for yours?** It TOTALLY takes an epiphany, something just has to click in your head. I don't know what it is exactly.. For me it was seeing a picture of myself. I lost 30 pounds on the Jenny Craig Program. Not having to think about what to eat, just popping it in the microwave is what worked for me.
I heard that the smart ones meals are great.
When do you go to Paris? How awesome!
That's awesome, Jill! Seriously...as much as I hate waking up before the butt crack of dawn, it's amazing what a difference making it to the gym does for my day. I feel so much better about myself, and feel so much better throughout the day. Though I so far have had zero weight loss *grumble*, it's still good to know that I am doing something healthy for my body.
It's a tough road, but worth it. And that will be nice to go an "all women" gym (:
Hooray! I am so proud of you. As a former exercise is of the devil believer, I love how I feel and that is what it's all about. Even on sore days, I think about getting stronger and then I kind of like being sore.
I like to do things in private all the time. First off, I don't like a lot of attention, and secondly, I can't stand being a failure, so I know exactly how you feel. But it will be worth it when you're strutting your stuff down the Champs Elysees.
Well done. After the initial fatique and soreness wears off consistent exercise does great things for body confidence.
I think body confident is way sexier than skinny. You are going to feel great, it was a good choice!
Good for you and I'm in the same boat as you, I've always thought, why join a gym and pay that money and never go. I hate the way I look but find that I lack the motivation to change, hence the two go hand in hand. Thanks for being an example to me.
thanks for sharing your epiphany. i tend to keep my "body image" projects secret, although i certainly never mind sharing the successes!
it is definitely helpful to me to read about other bloggers, who, like so many women i know, are on their own exercise and/or weight loss journeys.
i think my epiphany has come slowly over the past two years, now that i realize that my weight and the shape i'm in have so much to do with my health, not just they way i feel or look.
Good for you. I am glad you put it out here for all of us to follow your successes.
I am excited to here about your gym experiences. I have always wanted to try Curves/Contours. Good "luck" to you!
Great job! We are going to Hawaii in March, and I need to put this body back in shape. Yesterday I committed myself to doing better with excersing.
I am very proud of you and your goals.
Good for you Jill! It is hard to make yourself do something you aren't used to doing. I hope you can keep it up!
That's awesome Jill!!! That is big life changes. I had an epiphany after I had my 4th child. I promised myself I would get into shape and really commit. The first few weeks were definitely hard. I remember panting up the slightest hills (when walking). Now I am happy to say I am in the best shape I have EVER been in my life and it feels great!
I promise if you put it in your schedule it becomes addicting. Take it from someone who NEVER exercise 18 months ago. And I am serious I would seriously watch t.v. and do nothing else.
I am glad to hear you are preparing yourself for Paris. You for sure will do a lot of walking. My feet were sore last July from all the walking and shopping Angie and I did and we didn't even "sight" see persay.
I am so excited for you--way to go girl!
I think it's great you decided to join a gym. I certainly love going and know once you start you won't stop because it feels so good to your body. It really is addictive. Good for you.
**Do want to make big changes secretly? um..i dont think so..i havent had time to think about any!
Have you had a body-image epiphany
or are you still waiting for yours?** i think im good!
I have had this epiphany about a year ago. I don't weigh a lot less but I have lost inches and body fat. My clothes are loser and I can tell a difference. So far that is enough to keep me motivated. I would like to lose more weight and I am working on it but for now I am looking at it as more of an overall health change. Getting the habit to stick is my other focus. To not let it all die out.
I do want other changes that I never let out. I'm not sure why. It is wonderful that you have taken this step. It is hard but in a sick way I like the sore muscles because it feels like I'm changing them one workout at a time. So cheesy I know but that is the only way I know how to describe it.
Good for you Jill! That is wonderful! Traveling IS so exhausting that I don't blame you for wanting to prepare for it.
That is crazy that you are 17 lbs lighter! Obviously your changes are working. I am trying so hard myself right now to change my eating habits. I did so good last year and then biffed it at Christmas time. I haven't gotten back on track, but I have spent the last two days being really good!
Wow, that is awesome. I never would have guessed that was the huge change you were talking about but I am glad you did it. I think you will really be happy about it. It's great that Collette has shared her experience with you. I think the Contours concept is fabulous. In and out in 30 minutes and get results that you want.
I also like the lunch menu you have going. I always look at the fridge and I think to myself, "I just want something FAST!" It's usually my girls' nap time and I dont want to waste time preparing food. Which usually means it won't be healthy. I might have to pick up some of those meals for myself.
I can't believe you are going to Paris so soon!!!
I think all the time how I want to change, or work out/lose weight, but like you I can always come up with an excuse, sick kids, not enough sleep, etc. I have been doing an aerobics class with some ladies in my neighborhood, but it has essentially been cancelled since new years because of sick kids, etc. and I miss it. The other silly thing about me is as soon as someone notices I'm losing weight or looking better and mentions it, it deters me and I panic and stop what I'm doing. Isn't that the stupidest thing you've ever heard. I even think so and its what I tend to do. So crazy. Anyway, good for you!!
First of all, I like the idea of not saying things you know you are not going to do. I think that in itself is something to be proud of. WAY TO GO on the exercise. I graduated in Exercise and Sport Science so I have a testimony of physical activity. The benefits of exercise are WAY more important than just weight loss. Our bodies were created to move, everything works better when we do (hormones, brain function, bone density, digestion, blood flow...you name it). We were created to move.
congratulations jill! it's so empowering to make that kind of decision (i say this sitting on my couch after eating countless sugar cookies tonight). ( : i love working out because no matter what is going on my with my body i just feel better. i'm so happy for you!
Happy Valentines Day!!
happy valentine's day jill!
Good for you! THat is so awsome. How soon do you leave for Paris? I am really excited for you to go.
Interesting question about public changes - I often think it would be best to keep a secret of those big changes I commit to make but ultimately, the community, friends and family are a big support. Seriously, it helps me get up at 4:50, knowing you all care about what I am doing.
You go for it! I'll race you up the steps of Notre Dame. :)
Happy Valentine's Day!
It's interesting, the process of deciding what to share, whether it be blogging, or talking on the phone with people in our everyday lives. Good job on the gym thing.
missy jill what an extraordinary effort. I was going to get on your case for not walking anymore...In fact before christmas, I had taken pictures of where I go walking but hadn't had time to post about it. I think you have to want to do it, to make it work. I also think that nevertheless however you look going to europe is ADRENALINE so just do it because you want to be healthy and there for the long haul with your family. I have a friend that did that body scan to see how she was doing and it would be great to have those instead of a real scare....but as long as you go for it...just keep the big picture in mind!
YEAH For you! ALf refuses to let me sign for a gym...he doesn't think we should spend that money now...its been a couple of years since I have been wanting to do it, oh well....I am still furious for him taking my eleptical to the garage, I refuse to go down there and use it! PROUDNESS doesn't do a body good either! go for it! I am right behind you!
I'm sure you've lost those pounds by doing all the good deeds and good mail that you do!!!!! I wish you the best with this exercise plan- good luck and keep us posted on the progress!
I'm so excited for you! Exercising is definitely a disciplined thing to do, but I know you can do it! That is a big life change and it will definitely be worth it.
Way to Go Jill!
You have written about something that most people wouldn't which means that you are accomplishing more than just the change of thinking but also getting out of your comfort zone! I really respect that!
I started working out last January and dreaded it at first, got to know a few really neat people and really enjoy my time there. I was doing really well until my husband and I went to San Antonio in September(see my blog for some great pics if you haven't been there.) and being on the River Walk was amazing but, they had too many great restaraunts and we ate out everyday! Then the holidays hit and wham, I gained back what I had lost because I wasn't doing well with my eating.
But, i am determined to loose this weight again and low and behold I get sick and can't workout for the last 2 weeks. But I do know that I felt and do feel better about my life when I workout. I fall asleep faster at night, I have more energy AND I looked great!
One word of Wisdom from my sweet husband Matt who got a BS in Exercise Physiology. Slow and steady is the way; remember the tortoise and the hare? the tortoise won the race even though he was the slowest. SO BE THE TORTOISE!
I work out in the morning but after the kids leave for school, my daughter leaves at 9 a.m. and so I go then, I have a huge body issue with taking the aerobic classes with all the "Skinny Ones" but really like the challenge it gives so I watch FIT T.V. and work
out to some of the fun stuff there 2 times a week for a change.
You know Jill, we have never met and usually I am a lurker who occasionaly comments but I know that you can do this- you will have so much more fun in Paris, you are challenging yourself and even if you waver it will all be better than never having tried.
So if you would like we could be workout penpals so to say by encouraging each other- support is a great thing!
I really get inspired by your thoughts and am so glad that I wandered into your life (thanks to my sister-Diana,) but I want you to know that even though this is something that might have been hard to write about there are so many people that are rooting for you! AND also being inspired by you that they might also take the plunge. Which is what you do best!
Thanks so much! Here's to the fun of the stationary bike!
Good for you! Sounds like your on your way.
I had a body moment when my youngest jiggled my stomach and asked if I was Mrs. Clause. Painful as it was (and kind of funny)I knew I had to change for many reasons, for me and for them so I could be an active and healthy Mom as well as feel better about myself. The last 10 months I have done that, I am still a ways from my goal and it's been a hard road, but I know I can do it, and I know you can too! Hang in there.
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