A conversation in the car with the kids...
Whitney (gasping)--"Do you know what this boy in my class said today?"
Me (with fear in my voice)--"No, what?"
Whitney (in disbelief)--"He said he was stupid!! He added 5+5 and thought the answer was 11, then kept saying he was stupid. I told him not to say that because his brain would start to believe it."
Me (proudly)--"That's right. All those negative things we tell ourselves like 'I'm fat,' 'I'm ugly,' 'I'm dumb,' 'I'm not good at sports,' and stuff like that aren't good to say because when you say something over and over again your brain starts to believe it and then eventually you turn into that. That's why we should always think nice things like 'I'm smart,' 'I'm pretty,' 'I'm good at math,' 'I'm a good friend,' 'I love to read' and stuff like that because then our brain will believe that and we will turn into that instead. It's pretty cool huh?
Landon (casually)--"Yah, yah we get it, thanks for the lesson mom, I'll use it my whole life."
Me--(sincerely laughing)
Landon (beaming)--"That's right, I'm a riot."
How about that? Whitney actually listens to me enough that she appears to have retained the info and told the other kids at school (woohoo). I'm so pleased. I always respond this way whenever she says something negative about herself (even though this is rare). I don't want her to turn into a foolish girl who fishes for compliments by constantly criticizing herself or into a self-conscious woman who doesn't use her talents because she's convinced she doesn't have any!
**What do you tell your brain?**
24 comments:
I'm usually telling my brain that it's time to wake up & start functioning. (yawn)
I love how you explained this to your kids! It actually hit home with me, so thank you :)
Landon is a riot, I'm laughing so hard right now!
I'm the same way. I want raise kids confident and capable. I know someone that only tells her girls they are pretty and to me that is sad. As girls/women, we are so much more!
I used to have a barrage of negative thoughts like that when I was a teenager and early college. When I hit 20-ish, something changed and I'm much more positive about myself. Even though there's lots I want to change.
This post is so funny, a classic!!
p.s. You are such a good mom, I love that Whitney is teaching self esteem to those around her. What you are doing is working, hallelujah!
I say you have done well with your kids and that the power of positive thinking is an amazing thing. Whitney is on her way to becoming a little cognitive behaviorist!
I love what Whitney said (and Landon!).
Erin's in a pickle at school because there's a girl in her class who, apparently, keeps telling everyone that she (the girl) is the 'most beautiful in the class'. This is really irking Erin.
I tried to say to Erin, 'It's not up to her to say she's beautiful' but I immediately realised that that's wrong. It's certainly NOT up to OTHER people to judge what she is or isn't. What a quandary.
I said to Erin, 'Why does it annoy you anyway?' and she bellowed, 'I'm annoyed because she's NOT the most beautiful in the class! I AM!!!'
*severe blushing*
Wow. I am really impressed. I have never really thought too much about it (although I am sure I will have to start now that Noelle is in school and surrounded by other kids) but you are so right! There is NOTHING I dislike more than someone who is always saying negative stuff only to get a compliment!! I love the way you have taught you kids...a great lesson for me!
Great post!!!
This is just all - around great! So fun to read. Thanks, Jill. And thanks Landon, for being, well, a RIOT! And kudos to Whitney for having her head on straight and her heart right where it should be. I have to think her words helped that boy.
This conversation in the car was the best! Honestly! Your kids cracked me up! I love Landon's comment that he is a riot! He is! What a lesson that Whitney taught her peer! I love that! Such a proud Mom moment! Love it when we do something that they 'get' and are using!
This positive talk is so key!
This was great, Jill...a reminder that I needed. Thanks for all you do through your blog :)
I need to be re-programed. Where were you when I needed that lesson years ago?? I am going to memorize it and tell my kids.
hmm..im telling my brain..you REALLY dont have strands of white hair..i believe it..but nobody else does..hmm
what do i NOT tell my brain!
I tell my brain and pretty much anyone that will listen that my name is Miss America
Landon is a crack up, what a dry sense of humor.
This is such a great story. You know you must be doing something right when Whitney has learned the lesson and is passing it on to her peers!! I just love that Whitney already gets this better than I do. What a gift you've given her.
You know I struggle with this -- I've told my brain negative things so many times that it rebels against me when I try to introduce the positive. I need to start fresh!
impressive.. what a good mom moment! I bet you have lots of those!
landon's comment is cute.. sounds like my 9 year old!
Impressive. I will have to remember this talk to have with the kids more often.
this lesson will really help her in her pre-teen/teen years.
You're a great mom!
Thanks for commenting on my blog today! It made my day.
This is so funny! Once as a tween I told my mom she could get off her soap box after a little spiel like yours. Heee.
This is so cool that Whitney gets it- and that you know she does because it is a part of her and she wants to pass her good sense along. You are a good mom!!!
I like this.
Jill, this is an incredible conversation. I love that you've taught this to the kids and they are getting it and also sharing it. That IS a great woo-hoo moment!
awesome- you rock as a mom. i hope i can remember to use those thoughts with my own kid(s).
this was great- thanks for the reminder!
It's nice to see your lessons paying off. That they actually hear you and apply it to their life. Landon's comment was too funny.
Post a Comment